The light..

Dear Asia

My name is Susannah Strauss. I love your countries. More importantly I love the way the light in your countries makes my eyes go Hazel.

Please send Asias light to Australia.

All my love,

Susannah.

Come on baby light my fire

I am out of synch. Forgive.

The time? 4am. 15 Israeli travellers and I have just been thrown off a bus on the outskirts of Gokarna. We are all trying to make our way to Om Beach. One would think the fact that we were travelling to Om Beach would be a good sign. Om which in Hinduism is uttered as a mantra and in affirmations and blessings.

We travelled up through the hills to the cliff which overlooks the beach. On our travels a few joints and my Honey Bee (Indian brandy) is passed about between the lot of us. I find myself sharing a joint with a terribly attractive guy. He is a cross between Billy Crudup aka Russell the base player with mystique in Almost famous (google please) and Charles Manson (google again). He tells me I look like a doll. He later kisses me as we are hunting for firewood and I wonder if once again I am a sucker for a musician (he is carrying a guitar) or it is the whole 70s 'peace' thing.

We then become like many goats of India and scale down the cliffs towards the beach. No lives are lost on our journey - we are all Jews and well used to the trekking non?. We light a camp fire on the beach as it is only 5am and the guesthouses are not open. We share a few more joints and listen to The Doors -

You know that it would be untrue

You know that I would be a liar

If I was to say to you

Girl, we couldn't get much higher

Come on baby, light my fire

Come on baby, light my fire

Try to set the night on fire

The time to hesitate is through

No time to wallow in the mire

Try now we can only lose

And our love become a funeral pyre

Come on baby, light my fire

Come on baby, light my fire

Try to set the night on fire, yeah

And the sun rises...

Mysore

Mysore is popular for 4 things:

Sandalwood

My friend Aslam (I'll get to him later) took me to a very famous Ayurvedic doctor, Dr Aman. Aman was a shortish bloke wearing a white chesty Bonds and a full head of lusturous hair. Ayurveda is an ancient health care system which pretty much translates too "the knowledge of a long life." Aman took me through the various oils and their uses. He got most excited when he came to explain the use of Musk:

"This oil is very good for aphrodisiac. You know aphrodisiac? The meaning of life, chichi chichi?With musk the sexes never die. Black for your husband, here smell, after 5 minutes he feel like a tiger. White musk oil for women, here smell, when apply - fall down like a deer. After half an hour you are satisfied. Then again, again chichi chichi for five times. But not every day."

He then offered to apply some white musk oil to which i politetly declined.

I walked out of his consultation room come house come factory with:

1. Sandalwood - as I am too fat.
2. Waterlily oil - to fend off mosquitos in Cochi.
3. Almond oil - because my skin is dull
4. And there was another oil which is meant to be good for knowledge, attention span etc. but I honstly can't remember it. I obviously need it.

Incense

Ok, so I'm not talking about the smelly stuff you burn but rather the feeling of incense.

Insense
verb (used with object), -censed, -cens·ing.
to inflame with wrath; make angry; enrage

I met this guy who had a parrot in a box. I said "My friend, why is your parrot in such a small cage?" He told me to sit and give him 30 rupees. I obliged. He let the parrot out who started picking through a pile of cards throwing them away - one, two, three, four - until he got to the one he wanted. He then passed it to me. I then passed it to the guy who read my fortune from it.

My fortune - I will be unlucky in love for 2 years, my parents do not love me, my work will be very bad and someones mother hates me.

Fucking parrot.

Silk

Now we know silk is a glorious, luxurious fabric. A fabric maybe royalty would choose? Mysore is where the Royal family lived? I hope you are following my logic. Anyway, I walked into the Maharajas Palace and the strangest feeling came over me. I felt like I was home. My mother said maybe I was Indian in another life and I think I must have been an Indian princess.

Legal Marijuana

Mysore is a Holy city. And thus is one of the 5 cities in India which has legalised marijuana. The other cities are Varanasi, Puri, Pushkar and there is one more. Obviously I do need that oil of Dr Amans. Anyway, my friend Aslam took me to the Amsterdam Coffee shop where I tried bhang. Bang Bang it definitely shot me down.

Aslam and my conversation went something like this;

Aslam - You know the hashish
Me - I know hashish

Aslam - You know the coke?
Me - I know coke

Aslam - You know chasing the snake?
Me - You mean chasing the dragon?
Aslam - Snake.
Me - Dragon.

And there you have it. The four wonders of Mysore.

Please note (especially parents) I was more then careful.

Go on...

Read this first - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Head_bobble

I have noticed that the Goans have their own particular head wobble.

- one deep movement of the head to the left
- up to straight
- then a slight tilt to the right

When Randeep, my guest house manager wobbled, his reply said more then "OK" it also announced :

"Yes I am Randeep, I shake my head and smile because I am a happy happy man with a big tummy and no shirt." Randeep also had a smile has large as his belly too.

Randeep lacked one thing (besides a shirt) - that Indian desire to fill out forms:

"No my friend it is to hot for forms and passports today. You maybe just pay when you leave? Maybe?"

Randeep - his smile, his belly, his insatiable need to know the health of my brother* made my stay in Arambol.

* I have not got the traditional Western women travelling by herself wedding ring safeguard so I have concocted a fictionary 'brother' who is always coming to meet me. But somehow he always gets sick and has to stay behind - my poor brother.